Sri Aurobindo

Letters on Himself and the Ashram

The Complete Works of Sri Aurobindo. Volume 35

Admission, Staying, Departure

Departure from the Ashram [49]

By no means at my command can I make my mind even reasonably silent. It has again started bringing in doubts and misgivings and disquiet. One of them is that perhaps I am on the wrong path; this is not the goal that my nature wants. Perhaps it is some ambition that has attracted me to this path. I write this to you because I cannot deal with it effectively. Temperamentally the rest of my instruments seem more amenable to influences representing other paths and other goals. Am I really on the right path, have I really the call to it?

It is the right path for your inner nature and there there is the call. The resistance is from the outer, especially the mind, but that is due to a dissatisfied restlessness which is part of the outer mental nature (the reasons given are only supports which it builds for its restlessness) and that would have interfered wherever you might have been and on whatever path. To conquer this outer nature is the only way and that can be best done here, since the change of the outer being is here a part of the sadhana and you will receive the necessary help.

17 July 1937