Nirodbaran

Talks with Sri Aurobindo

Volume 1

10 December 1938 – 14 January 1941

21 November 1939

Satyendra: Nirod has a few more questions to ask: he is trying to formulate them, it seems.

Purani: Schomburg is a great woman-hater, it appears. On every occasion he brings in the question of woman’s shortcomings.

Sri Aurobindo: Is yours also a misogynist question?

Nirodbaran: Misogynist means woman-hater?

Sri Aurobindo: Yes.

Nirodbaran: No, my question is not that. Someone asked me, “If love is a seeking for the Divine, why does one seek human love after taking up Yoga?”

Sri Aurobindo: But is the man conscious of the Divine? If he is, either of two things may happen. All human relations may fall off or, keeping the divine love, he may keep human love as an appendage trying to raise it towards the Divine. I am not speaking of sex relations.

Nirodbaran: He may have faith that here is the Divine.

Sri Aurobindo: Faith is not consciousness. It is a preliminary element.

Nirodbaran: And if he is unconscious?

Sri Aurobindo: It depends on particular types. Some persons, as I said, after being conscious of the Divine don’t want any other relation with anyone else; at the same time they can keep a universal love for everybody. Others may keep a special relation with some, keeping it pure and trying to centralise everything towards the Divine.

Nirodbaran: It should be then predominantly psychic?

Sri Aurobindo: No, it can be higher vital, free from all desires, attachments, etc.

Satyendra: There is the other extreme also. People here say that there should not be love for anyone else except for the Divine!

Sri Aurobindo: As I said, it depends on the type. It does not mean that one should give up friendship with somebody for the sake of the Divine.

Nirodbaran: But friendship with the other sex involves danger.

Purani: There his Schomberg is coming in!

Nirodbaran: If you mean I am a woman-hater, no! Besides, we are speaking from different viewpoints.

Sri Aurobindo: He is speaking from the viewpoint of fear!

Nirodbaran: A last question: When people are united by love and come to lead a divine life but then their relation breaks off and each goes his or her own way, is it because the purpose of love has been served that the separation occurs?

Sri Aurobindo: Not necessarily. There are cases where their old lower nature has dropped away and they are going side by side. In other cases it may be that one has not entered the path. There are also examples where one has come for the Divine and the other hasn’t or has formed fresh attachments after taking up Yoga.

Nirodbaran: Could it be said that in their united life for the Divine, there may be a mixture in such cases?

Sri Aurobindo: Yes, there may be a mixture and, under cover of the Divine call, they may satisfy the vital.